[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bZkp7q19f0] 오빤강남스타일
Holy shit, is that a foreign language on the radio? Or is someone doing a poor imitation of Creed’s speech impediment?
강남스타일
Dear radio: making fun of speech impediments is not politically correct anymore. Ugh, I thought we’d come further than this! Once I finish driving home I’m going to make myself a cocktail of vodka and facepalm.
낮에는따사로운인간적인여자
..........................Holy shit, that IS a foreign language!
커피한잔의여유를아는품격있는여자
AMURRICA GOTZ DA MULTICULTURAL ‘PPRECIATION YALL. WURR LYKE SOOOO CULTUREDDDD.
밤이오면심장이뜨거워지는여자
Now if we could just get “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” off the air, we’d practically be England.
그런반전있는여자
And if my brain and that second thought in all-caps could never ever ever ever get back together, that’d probably be good for humanity too.
나는사나이
낮에는너만큼따사로운그런사나이
MAN, do I feel hip to the open mind! This must be what pot would feel like if my body would ever let me successfully get high!
커피식기도전에원샷때리는사나이
Stupid THC receptors. Or whatever. You make vodka and facepalm the only thing that will alter my mental state.
밤이오면심장이터져버리는사나이
If this song is like a drug, is it addictive? Is it legal to market and consume in the United States? Most drug bans were influenced by racism....so since we haven’t had a drug ban that targets Koreans, is it only a matter of time?
그런사나이
Yes, no, and fuck-we-better-get-our-fix-while-we-still-can.
아름다워사랑스러워, 그래너(hey!) 그래바로너(hey!)
Oh look, a lyric I can understand!
아름다워사랑스러워, 그래너 (hey!) 그래바로너(hey!) 지금부터갈데까지가볼까
murmurmurmurmur HEY murmurmurmur HEY.
오빤강남스타일, 강남스타일
Probe-a-dong-and-smile?
오빤강남스타일, 강남스타일
Grope-a-thongaphile?
오빤강남스타일
What is Gangnam-style, anyways?
Eh- Sexy Lady, 오빤강남스타일
Oh, this song must be about sexual attraction! This highly relatable theme almost certainly contributes to its universality.
Eh- Sexy Lady, 에에에에에에
Can I analyze this for my next music theory project? OH WAIT. I’m a junior, I don’t have to take music theory anymore! Best mood ever!
정숙해보이지만놀땐노는여자
So should I begin learning the lyrics syllable by syllable and pretend I know what they mean?
이때다싶으면묶었던머리푸는여자
Or should I just croak the approximate melodic line with all the clarity of Tommy Wiseau underwater and hope that nobody notices?
가렸지만웬만한노출보다야한여자
Definitely the latter.
그런감각적인여자
Because after enough quality bonding time at Sherman Ave HQ shots, nobody can understand anyone anyways. Mushmouth singing, here I come.
나는사나이
This song could probably have the lyrical insight of Mmmbop and no one in the Western world would be the wiser.
점잖아보이지만놀땐노는사나이
Okay, we can cut Hanson a break. Not every kid’s got poetry skills on par with Mattie Stepanek.
때가되면완전미쳐버리는사나이
And if your hair is longer than your dick, you deserve sympathy, not derision.
근육보다사상이울퉁불퉁한사나이그런사나이
But this guy sounds like his balls have probably dropped long ago. Wait…if his lyrics turn out to suck, we can cut him a break because he’s bilingual* and therefore definitely intelligent!
아름다워사랑스러워, 그래너(hey!) 그래바로너(hey!)
Whoa-ah-oh-ah, it’s International Love.
아름다워사랑스러워, 그래너 (hey!) 그래바로너(hey!) 지금부터갈데까지가볼까
Only I bet none of the collaborators on this song ever physically abused aforementioned “Sexy Lady.”
뛰는놈그위에나는놈, baby baby, 나는뭘좀아는놈
La La La La La.
뛰는놈그위에나는놈, baby baby, 나는뭘좀아는놈
La La La La Laaaaa.
You know what I’m saying
...No. No, I don’t. But I don’t even care.
________________
*Yes, “baby baby” and “sexy lady” count as bilingual.
Well, do you know how to turn someone on in another language?
