All of the Animals at Rainforest Cafe are Animatronic, and I Can Prove It

Everyone’s favorite tropical forest themed restaurant has been hiding the truth from us for too long. Rainforest Cafe, which boasts its unique atmosphere and live animals that obediently sit and watch you eat, has some explaining to do. After about 30 visits over the years to the London-based chain, I have concluded that their act is a complete sham, and their animals are fake. Every birthday party, first date, and business lunch I have had there is now tainted with the fraudulent lies of my former favorite eatery.

First of all, none of the restaurants are in the actual rainforest. You can find the rainforest cafe in Texas, New York, Illinois, and Minnesota, among other US states. I can say with 100% certainty that there is no rainforest in the Mall of America. Like, maybe in other parts of Minnesota, but inside??? Newsflash: the rainforest is outdoors. They thought they could pull the wool over my eyes with that sham of a tropical location. Nice try!

Second of all, there is a storm every half hour on the dot. That is simply outrageous to begin with, but as we’ve discussed, none of the restaurants are actually outside, so we can safely assume that the storms are fake as well.

Now, when the storms occur, the animals freak out, as you would expect. Well, the animals do the same exact thing every single time there’s a storm. Um, what? Rainforest Cafe, that isn’t even convincing in the slightest. At least add some variation in the activity of the animals so that it seems like their response to the environment is organic. It becomes clear after seeing the “storm” happen 12+ times that something fishy is happening. Strike two.

Lastly, the animals never respond to anything other than the storm every half hour. Um, excuse me? They’re SURROUNDED by food. Food! Animals love food. How on earth could you have a restaurant where the animals watch humans eat, completely free of any restraint or enclosure?? They HAVE to be animatronic. The jig is up, rainforest cafe. Case closed, come clean already.