Freshman Hall Friendship Not Looking Like It Will Make it Past Rush

EVANSTON, IL – Reports from the 3rd floor of Bobb-McCulloch Tuesday afternoon confirmed that a casual friendship between freshmen hallmates John Paulsen and Alex Miller does not appear to have the strength to make it past this winter’s fraternity recruitment.  Citing the relationship’s tenuous foundation in the proximity of their rooms and their similar eating schedules at Sargent dining hall, multiple sources asserted that once the freshmen had joined fraternities in the winter their friendship was not likely to hold on.

“Yeah, Alex is really chill, we’ve been hanging a lot this quarter,” commented Paulsen, failing to acknowledge that their relationship would be reduced to minute-long hallway conversations and occasional weekend dinners within the coming months.  “It’s cool how our hall has this nice sense of community already.”

Speaking with on-the-scene reporters, both freshmen confirmed that they had not planned on joining Greek life in college, but had become interested based on the atypical nature of Northwestern fraternities.  At press time, Paulsen and Miller had found that they would be in the same winter Econ 202 course, a class that would eventually be the subject of 80% of the pair’s conversations following their acceptance into separate fraternities.