Sherman Ave Freshman Guide: How to Traverse Sheridan

You just woke up in your cozy, lofted bed in Elder and stroll to your fridge looking for a tasty breakfast because you learned early Fall quarter not to rely on the Elder dining hall but oh no! Your fridge is empty!

It’s Saturday night and you are in some kind of mood: you and you bros just finished your pre game in Allison, your ratio is perfect, you have texts from like, three different upperclassmen. You check the time and it’s frat o'clock baby.

Your alarm goes off at 8:15 like it does every fucking day because you have class in Tech at 9am and for some goddamn reason your apartment is on Clarke street.

Time for The Sheridan Shuffle! Whatever the reason may be, we all find ourselves making that pedestrian pilgrimage along what cool kids call “The Backbone of Northwestern”. Today, we analyze the multitude of ways that kids do the Sheridan Shuffle. (I’m serious though, cool kids call it that.)

WALKING

The classic. Says to the world, “Hey, I’ll get there when I get there”. Shows no fear of the cold, nor tardiness. The pedestrian is truly the master of their own fate.

RUNNING

Cool as hell. Especially if you are clearly just late for class, and not doing it for your health or some shit.

LONGBOARD

The only flaw is that you will be going too fast for the throngs of women who will instantly want to have sex with you.

LYFT

It’s like less than a mile are you seriously going to pay 7 bucks to ride in a strangers car just to get there 3 minutes sooner? Come on kid.

INTER CAMPUS LOOP

A fun gamble! Is this bus going to North Campus? Is it going to Ryan Field? Is it going to Kenosha? Climb aboard and find out!

SAFE RIDE

Do they even go between two on campus locations? Do they even exist at all? Call us if you find out I haven’t actually ever been able to work the app.

LEAPFROG

Great with a partner, kinda weird by yourself.

SKIING