“We Need Art Now More Than Ever,” Says Theatre Major Putting On Some Dumb Bullshit

EVANSTON, IL - Noting the current political climate as well as the rise of xenophobia, homophobia, and misogyny across the country, Theatre junior Jasper Collins told Sherman Ave that he is more determined than ever to pull some nonsensical self-indulgent bullshit.

“Under fascist and communist regimes, it is the artists who have the power to fight back against injustice,” said Collins. “That’s why I’m directing a production of Wicked, except Elphaba will be wearing a Donald Trump wig, and Glinda will be dressed as Adolf Hitler. It’s called making a statement. Maybe try it sometime.”

As a member of the Sit + Spin Productions theatre board, Collins felt that he was in the perfect position to take so-called “risks” with his art against the current presidential administration. “If even just one audience member changes their political views, then it will all have been worth it,” stated Collins, apparently unaware that the only people seeing this steaming pile of shit would be his dumbfuck liberal friends.

Luckily, Collins’ production of Wicked is not the only wet turd to hit Northwestern’s campus this spring. JTE is putting on a production of Fiddler on the Roof but with Muslims, Arts Alliance has scheduled a production of Rent but set in a Planned Parenthood clinic, and Vertigo has announced that it will only be producing plays featuring trans Syrian refugees, though all the writers will be straight white men, of course.

Though Sherman Ave was planning on writing a negative review of the production, after Collins informed us that any criticism is “siding with the oppressor,” we decided against it. So instead of reading our review, maybe Apply to Sherman Ave?