Sophomore Undergraduate to Ask God for the Perfect “Laughing Candid” This Holiday Season

Medill sophomore Annabelle Hitch was recently spotted in her room, window open, looking to the stars and asking some kind omnipotent being to deliver one thing, the perfect candid laughing profile picture. Research has suggested that Annabelle is in desperate need of such a gift, considering her last six profile pictures have been posed arms-over-the-shoulder shots in definitively mundane places, one of them being Subway. This holiday season has led Annabelle to long for a photo that shows the world how fun she can appear.

When asked why it’s taken her so long to produce a candid laughing photo, Annabelle commented, “Every photo I try. I fall a bit, turn my head slightly, and pose like I’m having too much fun to take a photo. But every time I check the photo, I look like a hungry underfed badger. It’s like finding a needle in a malnourished haystack.”

Annabelle will be attending three social events this week with high hopes her wish will be granted. But Annabelle is not leaving it up to just fate. She has already purchased two canisters of laughing gas and one ounce of Blue Rhino Kush, a strand only available in Peru. This combo will leave her laughing hysterically for the duration of the week, meaning all she needs is some divine Justin Barbin-esque force to step up and make her dreams come true.