Collective Orgasms Rock Medill amidst Rumors of Obama on Campus
EVANSTON, Il. – Following the rumors that President Barack Obama would be speaking at Northwestern’s campus this coming Thursday, every student in the Medill School of Journalism collectively orgasmed at the same exact time, in what has been described by some Medill students as “the greatest sexual experience [they] have ever had.”
“When I heard that the most powerful man in the world was coming to speak to me – to me personally – at my school, I just couldn’t help but ejaculate all over the inside of my Levi's” commented Ezra Rothberg (Medill, ’16). “Maybe I’ll even get a chance to speak to him personally. In fact, I definitely will. Why wouldn’t he want to talk to me? I’m in Medill!”
The group climax, being tagged as “#Groupgasm” on Twitter and elsewhere, has generated considerable conversation amongst Medill undergraduates, with some even speculating it is the work of a "phantom Medilldo."
“I was in my social policy class with my friend Leif,” said Sara Patel (Medill, ’17), “and we both felt it at the same time, and just looked at each other like ‘yeah.’
“It was pretty cool, hashtag groupgasm.”
This is the first recorded collective orgasm within Medill, which follows on the heels of last year’s collective orgasm in Bienen, after the announcement Class of 2014 Commencement Speaker Riccardo Muti.
